Thr Heroes of Healthcare

I hate to admit it, but some political strategists are geniuses. They have taken something that has been hated, reviled, and scorned by Americans for generations and turned it into an institution that many now believe we must protect, foster, and preserve. No, I'm not talking about telemarketers who call during dinner. I'm talking about the medical insurance industry. Over the years, I've heard many people say, "I love my doctor," but, until now, I never heard anyone say, "I love my health insurance." But to some, medical insurance companies have become the Heroes of Healthcare. During the Great Healthcare Debate, legislators and their "gullibles" are saying they like their current healthcare system so much that they don't want anyone to touch it. In fact, there are claims that the very idea of changing the healthcare system is unAmerican.

Obviously, if people don't like a certain approach or the principles or cost of any of the proposed legislation, they should object. I'm talking about those who now claim that we don't need to change anything about healthcare at all. Not a single Republican voted to even open up debate on the issue. Obviously, they don't think we need to change anything. They're probably even okay with not having any current magazines in the waiting rooms.

When both of my kids were born, we got bills from the hospital that included tests for my wife that she didn't get, treatments that she didn't receive, and medications that weren't prescribed for her. Each time I complained to the hospital. They said it was their procedure to bill for all of these things. It was a "package" -- like one of those Las Vegas "Three days, six nights" things or whatever they're called. They couldn't understand why I was so upset, since my insurance company would probably pay for the overcharges. I told them I was upset because the bills didn't represent the truth. They immediately corrected them. They didn't argue or fight or even put me on hold listening to "Moon River." This showed me that they knew the bills were unfair. Unfair? They even charged my wife for ice. I guess we're lucky they didn't ask us to chip in for the air-conditioning.

Do you know even one person who doesn't have a similar story?

One of the objections of the nay-sayers has to do with the government getting involved in healthcare. Haven't they ever heard of Social Security and Medicare? Would they like those to be abolished, too?

And of course there's the cost objection. These people didn't object to government spending when it came to the Bush and Obama bail-outs of the financial industry, but they don't like the idea of spending whatever it takes to fix healthcare. Oh I forgot, they don't think it needs fixing.

Oh, really?

The U.S. spends more on healthcare than any other country, yet, the last time the World Health Organization put out its rankings, we were 37thin healthcare – in between Slovenia and Costa Rica. Don't those who oppose any change think we should at least move up to, I don't know, maybe 15th and kick Iceland's butt out of there?

Usually, our medical bills are so hard to read, that most of us don't bother trying. Couldn't the billing system use a little reform?

When a ride in an ambulance for three blocks costs hundreds of dollars, shouldn't someone look into that?

Is waiting eleven hours in an emergency room okay with those folks who don't want anything changed?

If the Senators were all really voting their "consciences" as so many of them claim, don't you think at least a dozen or so Democrats would disagree with parts of the bill and at least a similar number of Republicans might think, "Hey, that's not bad?" It's an amazing coincidence that on something this complex so many consciences happen to line up with their party's agenda.

I just hope that a whole bunch of Senators don't yell so much in opposition or in favor of the healthcare bill that they hurt their throats. It would be a shame if they had to seek medical attention. Oh, wait a minute. It wouldn't be a problem for them at all. Members of Congress already have great healthcare.

Is Disney Goofy?

When it comes to our jobs, we are all replaceable. The current recession has certainly brought this home to many people. There's always somebody who is younger, smarter, or closer to the boss' cousin waiting to step in and take somebody's job. But how would you feel if you lost your job to a cartoon character? That's kind of what happened to noted sportscaster Al Michaels. Michaels is the famous voice America has been hearing on Monday Night Football for years. Next year, he'll be broadcasting Sunday Night Football on NBC. And he'll have that NBC job all because of a cartoon character named Oswald the Lucky Rabbit.

It's a bit complicated, but Disney owns ABC and ESPN. Universal owns NBC. Michaels has been working for Disney who wanted Oswald who was owned by Universal. So they made a swap: NBC got Al Michaels, and Disney got Oswald the Lucky Rabbit. I wonder how many MBAs they needed to work that out.

Of course, there were other parts of the deal. NBC gave ESPN more access to certain sports events, but the clincher was Oswald. In case you never heard of this lucky rabbit, you're not alone. He was a character created by Walt Disney more than eighty years ago, before Walt came up with that famous mouse of his. Somehow he lost the rights, and somehow Universal/NBC got them.

When I first learned about the deal a few months ago, I thought it was a bit strange. But when I heard Al Michaels' voice the other night on Monday Night Football, I couldn't get it out of my head that this man -- the announcer who, at the 1980 Winter Olympics, came up with the phrase, "Do you believe in miracles?" -- was being traded for a fictional character.

Reacting to the deal, Disney president Robert Iger commented, "... Oswald is back where he belongs, at the home of his creator and among the stable of beloved characters created by Walt himself." I guess the corporate people at Disney thought it was important for Oswald the Lucky Rabbit to finally get away from the bad influence of the likes of Woody Woodpecker and start hanging out with someone like Bambi.

I admit that I don't understand big business, but are the Disney stockholders really excited that after all these years, they've finally recovered Oswald the Lucky Rabbit? Are they saying things like, "I'm not interested in profits or losses as long as we have Walt's rabbit again?"

What about the kids who watch cartoons? Have they been moping for years, uncooperative at home, and uninterested at school because Oswald the Lucky Rabbit has not been part of their lives? In fact, is this rarely seen rabbit what's been missing from American culture all these years? Would the crime rate have gone down and the literacy rate have gone up if we all had just watched Oswald as children?

Who knew that a cartoon character that most of us had never heard of could be so important? And if Oswald is this significant, other cartoon characters might have equal value in American society. When our economic situation started going downhill, should our top economists have consulted Scrooge McDuck? Instead of concentrating on Brad and Angelina, should all those gossip magazines really be focusing on Boris and Natasha? Rather than turning to all those diet gurus, should millions of Americans be commiserating with Porky Pig?

Oswald won't be calling the football games next year instead of Al Michaels, but maybe we're just a slip on a banana peel away from something like that happening. A television performer's career is precarious at best. We've all seen actors and actresses replaced on shows by others who are younger, blonder, or willing to work cheaper. But at least these people were replaced by actual humans. How would you feel if you got back to the office from lunch one day and Tweety Bird was sitting at your desk?

Anything's possible in television. Trading places with cartoon characters could start a trend. Who knows? Maybe David Letterman will end up at ABC in a trade for Fred Flintstone. At least CBS wouldn't have to worry about Fred fooling around.